A Welcoming Face

       First impressions are important.  They give us the chance to convey something to another at the outset of a relationship, and if we squander this opportunity, it can be impossible or at least take long time to get a second chance.  This month’s reflection comes from a recent and quite personal story where someone made a first impression on me.  I should say from the outset that I did clear telling this story with my wife Stephanie!  Anyway, we are expecting our third child very soon.  The temptation with the third, of course, is to assume that each child and accompanying pregnancy will be the same as the last.  This is never true, but it was certainly a surprise and even upsetting when our regular OBGYN told us that something came up and we would need to go see a specialist OB.  Time went slowly then, and it felt like a long time before we actually were setting foot in the specialist’s office.  Many things were going through my mind that morning, but one strange thought kept surfacing for me: this receptionist has a really hard job!
       The first realization I had about this was walking up to the receptionist’s window with my wife.  My grimaced face must have looked like I had just drunk some sour milk because the lovely receptionist seemed to pause, give me time, and then smile gently towards me.  It was only then that I realized I was not exactly projecting excitement in being there!  The tricky thing for the receptionist, though, was that she welcomed patients who were coming to see either a regular OBGYN or the prenatal specialist.  The former group likely came in happy to be there, ready for some ultrasonic pictures of their little one or perhaps the big reveal as to whether a girl or boy was on the way.  The latter group, those coming to see the specialist, would not be projecting the same feelings as the first.  Their appearances were likely much more apprehensive, fearful, and uncertain.  I found myself drawn towards watching the patients arrive to the waiting room and trying to ascertain the group to which each person belonged.  The receptionist had to be ready to welcome all sorts of people, including some who would rather be anywhere else than this office.
       Mercifully, this was a one-time trip for our family, but I could not stop thinking about the experience in the days that followed.  This office reminded me, in many ways, of the Catholic Church.  Some people arrive at our parish doors excited to be there, hungry to deepen their faith and find solace for the week’s troubles.  Others arrive, perhaps feeling forced to come due to some familial obligation.  We see this situation most often surrounding events such as weddings, funeral Masses, or other sacramental moments.  Sometimes, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for us, as representatives of the Catholic Church, to make a good first impression.  Hospitality is a mark of godliness throughout Sacred Scripture, but it does beg the question: how do we, as a worshiping community, show hospitality to the sinner, the broken, the bereaved, the un-churched, the skeptic, and to the ones we have wounded?  It seems important to me that we think about these questions before making our first impressions so that we might share the Good News by how we welcome others.
       At some point in our lives, each of us has probably been part of the group who does not want to be in a church for a variety of reasons, and we certainly all have family members or friends who have stepped away from an active practice of their faith.  What might the receptionist’s demeanor teach us about welcoming those who come through our parish doors or even simply know us from work or our neighborhoods?  One thing this particular receptionist was very skilled at was reading people’s faces and demeanor but also realizing that there was a greater, sometimes unknowable mystery within the person.  Knowing this, I would say it is important to pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance when making a first impression on behalf of the Church.  What we say or refrain from saying, do or avoid doing could be critical in helping someone find the deeper relationship with God for which we all long.  Overall, I think the Church does a wonderful job of welcoming others, but we can always reexamine our personal part to play in this.  Being the voice, the hands, and the face of Christ to others is a real part of each of our vocations, and we must be conscious of our first impressions so that the Body of Christ might one day count all of humanity as its members and have all of its members reunited.